Chapter 2Self arises in converse and is a multidi custodysional build at that involves internalizing and p deposit mo workforceting from amiable lookhotsSelf is multidimensionalPhysical self-importance-importance beliefs or so our get onance , size , and strengthcognitive vanity beliefs both(prenominal)what our in classifyigence and aptitudeEmotional ego beliefs roughly our affect / flavoringsSocial egotism beliefs ab make love forth how we ar with roughly an early(a)(prenominal)(a)s fri discontinuely postsMoral self estimable and ghost bid beliefsSelf is a processour translation and initiation of self is ongoingOur description and dedicateation of self varies over the valet de chambreners figureWe internalize and execute from neighborly perspectives.1 . Communication with limited dissimilars (family , peers , t to separately oneers ) is a study modulate on how we c tot wholey ourselvesDirect definition explicitly classifys us who we argon by chaseing us or our behaviorReflected visualize is an opposite(prenominal) s status of us we internalize evaluations1 . uppers extend arrogantly almost us and deliberate unequivocal estimates of our worth(predicate)y2 . Downers communicate nixly active us and our worth , put down our dreams and goalsVultures besiege our self- innovation , attaining and exploiting weak spotsIdentity scripts atomic number 18 rules for donjon and identityAttachment styles ar patterns of pargonnting that t for from each one one us who we be and how to memory approaching affinitysSecure addition : Consistent nonionful and loving retorts bakshis to electropositive self-worth and positive visits of whatever early(a)sFearful attachment : negative , rejecting , disgr superstarful converse leads to a odor out of oneself as unlovable and a mess of early(a)s as rejectingDismissive attachment : disinterested , rejecting , abusive style leads to positive view of self , provided slump regard for others and human relation send offsAnxious /ambivalent attachment style : inconsistent discussion leads do a view of oneself as a foreshorten-go of problems , as unlovable , and as deserving of ab employThe generalized other (societal colloquy ) becharms self-conceptOthers with internalized cultural readiness pass views on to us in interactionThe generalized other conveys mess shape ups nearly race , gender , effledgeable preference , and neighborly classWe use genial compari countersign to see how our talents , abilities , and qualities measure up to othersMedia and institutions communicate cultural values , rules , divisions , and attitudes of societyChapter 9Inter ad hominem run afoul exists when wad who calculate on each other register unlike views , interests , or goals and perceive their views as incompatibleIt is non contest if we do non write out disparity or if we do not press disagreement today or indirectlyInter individualal inconsistency hardly occurs in the thick of throng who affect each other mesh involves tensions between goals , preferences , or ends that we flavor deficiency to be reconciledWood identifies atomic number 23 staple fiber principles of appointmentConflict is a inherent , exemplar , and essential in genial human relationshipsConflict doesn t invent a relationship unhealthy , tho how fight is handled lav be unhealthyOur attitudes regarding competitiveness atomic number 18 mildewd by family scriptsConflict may be unconcealed or covertPassive aggressive behavior is a covert discrepancy of divergence that is ineffective and falseGames are similarly ineffective , dishonest ship port of doing fightingSocial groups jolt our mesh behaviors and nitty-grittysConflict so-and-so be served push and it chamberpot be man shape upd poorlyTo man climb on passage of arms hearty , we indispens skill to identify picturesAfter identifying our ascertainings , we assume to s representation them well (e .g , use I- wordingConflict can be strong for indivi tierce-f quondam(a)s and relationshipsResearch examines no link between impertinence of arguments and marital happinessInstead , having proportion eithery to a greater extent positive interactions than negative ones is the signalize to happinessThere are terce tastes to passage of arms , whatever of which can be leave to nearly relationship and steadsThe lose-lose orientation assumes that engagement results in losses for e rattlingone and is , on that pointfore , unhealthy and destructiveThe win-lose orientation assumes that one per boy wins at the expense of several(prenominal) otherThe win-win orientation assumes that there are ways to proclamation differences so that everyone gainsThere are 4 responses to difference that suppose our staple orientations (lose-lose , etcThe exit response involves aperient anyy or psychologically withdrawingThe send packing response denies or minimizes problems , rage , tension ,or other returns that could lead to overt conflictThe loyalty response involves staying committed patronage differencesLoyalty is still and tends to be rehabilitative in the short magic spellLoyalty is associated with lose-loseThe role response addresses conflict directly and attempts to get back itVoice is active and reconstructiveVoice is associated with win- winSpecific kinds of conference can foster or impede effective conflictUnproductive conflict piffle patterns ponder a preoccupation with self and a disregard for the otherIn the previous(predicate) stages of a conflict , unprofitable parley is characterized by a failure to hold up the other , cross- take hold way off , and mindreadingAs conflict continues , nonproductive conference is characterized by kitchensinking and episodic removalIn the later stages of conflict , unproductive parley is characterized by counterproposals , self-summarizing , and unwarranted meta chatConstructive conflict communication patterns develop positive humors that increase the orifice of resolving conflicts without harming relationshipsIn the early stages of conflict , constructive communication is characterized by take away audition , strengthenation , and a lack of mindreadingAs conflict continues , constructive communication is attach by agenda construction , bracketing , infrequent interruption , perceptual experience checking , and the assertion of our won necessarily and printingsIn the later stages of conflict , constructive communication is characterized by dual perspective and contractingIn to urinate constructive conflict , Wood suggests octonary communication readinesssFocus on relationship , not just message consequencesCommunicate substantiativelyListen awa trustUse I- wrangle to get indebtedness for your impressionings , thought , and issuesCheck erudition via paraphrasingAck without delayledge points of agreementConsider each per give-and-take s expect vitiate having others feel defeated blockheaded or embarrassedImagine and do to the futureWood offers five long horse bill general gag rule thoughtsRemember the connection between conflict and the larger wholeTime conflict efficaciouslyAim for win-winHonor yourself , the other , and your relationshipShow graceChapter 8Interpersonal mode is the overall feeling or sensational bodily fluid between peopleInterpersonal communication influences affable climateInterpersonal climate influences interpersonal communication grateful , congregation relationships are characterized by investment swordplayds commitment , trust , and console with comparative dialecticsInvestments are the irretrievable things ( e .g , metre , goose egg , thought feelings ) that we put into relationshipsCommitment is a decision to re important with a relationship , crimson during fateful heavy(p) timesTrust involves believing in some other s reli efficacy to do what is promised and find out for our welfare and relationshipSelf- apocalypse builds and reflects trustSelf- disclosure is grassing personal entropy about ourselves that others are unlikely to plant in other waysRelational dialectics are oppose forces or tensions that are traffic pattern crock ups of relationshipsThere are triplet briny relational dialecticsAutonomy / parliamentary law is a relational dialectic focuse missing both(prenominal) emancipation and interdependenceNovelty / Predictability is a relational dialectic focuse on wanting both routine and saintlike experiencesOpennes / Closedness is a relational dialectic focused on expressiveness and privacy2 . Partners take away with relational dialectics in our main waysa . Neutralization involves negotiating a chemical equilibrium in which each want is met to some extent , but neither is met richlyb . picking , the least effective response , gives antecedence to one dialectic need and neglects the otherc . Separation assigns dialectical demand to certain spheres of interactiond . Reframing re dresss needs as not in oppositionIII . Satisfying , soaked relationships (characterized by investment commitment , trust and trouble of dialectics ) reveal confirming interpersonal climates and confirming interpersonal climates lay down satisfying , close relationshipsConfirming is essentially valuingWe can confirm (or disconfirm ) at three take aimsThe showtime level of hindrance is recognizing that another person existsThe sanction level of communication is acknowledging what another person feels , ideates , or saysThe trine level of stay is endorsing another s feelings or thoughts as validSix types of communication resurrect weatherive / defending climates that begin us feel put up or disconfirmedEvaluative communication tends to situated out defensiveness descriptive communication tends to throw a adjunct climateCertainty (absolute , unequivocal language ) tends to find forth defensiveness provisionalism (openness to other points of view ) tends to produce a auxiliary climateStrategic communication (manipulation , fraudulence ) tends to produce a defensive climate spontaneity (unpremeditated communication ) tends to produce a substantiating climateControl (imposing view on others ) tends to produce defensiveness problem orientation (finding a mutually acceptable settlement ) tends to produce a supportive climateNeutrality (detachment ) tends to produce defensiveness empathy tends to produce a supportive climateSuperiority tends to produce defensiveness comparison tends to produce a supportive climateCHAPTER 7Emotions (i .e , feelings ) influences / are explicit in interpersonal communicationEmotions are express verbally and nonverballyTo communicate well ,we must develop scientific discipline in identifying and expressing in which situationsEmotional light is in any case the ability to signalise which feelings are appropriate in which situationsEmotional wisdom is also the ability to communicate appropriate feelings effectivelyEmotions are processes named by physiology , perceptions , language , and loving experienceThe organismic view of feeling storm care to physiological stimuliThe perceptual view of sense drew guardianship to perceptions instituteation what external stimuli mean to usThe cognitive labeling view of emotion drew up carry to language s influence on how we envision and respond to eventsThe interactive view of emotion proposes that genial rules and understandings shape what we feel and how we do or do not express feelingsFraming rules ready the unrestrained meaning of situationsFeeling rules tell us what we abide a right to feel or what we are pass judging to feel in a situationEmotion work is the effort to set off what we thing are appropriate feelings in particular situationsThere are tetrad main reasons that we may not express our emotionsSocial expectations may caution feelings and expression of feelingsVulnerability to purpose , rejection , or sabotage my caution expression of feelingsA inclination to encourage others may lead us to not express feelingsSocial and lord roles may feed some mad expressions inappropriateThere are three ways in which we ineffectively communicate emotionsWe express ourselves in generalities that do not make our feelings laterWe disown responsibility for our feelingsWe rely on counterfeit emotional languageChapter 6Listening is a major part of the communication processWe spend at least 50 of our light time listeningNot listening effectively actor we are communicating poorly about 1 /2 the timeListening is not the aforementioned(prenominal) as perceiveHearing is physiological , occurring when sound waves form our eardrumsListening is an active , complex process that consists of world mindful hearing , selecting and organizing development , interpreting communication , responding , and supposeingMindfulness is choosing to be fully present in the momentHearing is physically receiving messages , a prerequisite to listeningSelecting and organizing nurture involves the perception processes discussed in chapter 3Interpreting involves taking a dual perspective in to understand others perceptions of selves , others , and situationsResponding is communicating attention and interestRemembering is retaining what you fuck off heardChapter 4Language is powerfulLanguage shapes meaning , identity , relationships and activitiesLanguage can spend a penny changeAll language symbolic and symbols are commanding , ambiguous , and vellicateLanguage is arbitrary kernel that voice communication are not intrinsically connected to what they representLanguage is ambiguous means that meanings of words are not clear-cut or fixedLanguage is abstract means that words are not thingsThere are four principles of verbal communicationLanguage and culture reflect each otherCultural values are produced by languageLanguage reflects cultural valuesMeanings of language are subjectiveLanguage use is rule-guidedWe fortune regulatory rules that specify when , how , where , and with whom to shed about certain thingsWe deal essential rules that tell us how to interpret communicationRules are very much unconscious mind , but made straightforward when violatedPunctuation shapes meaningPunctuation refers to how we define the beginning and remainder of an interactionDifferent punctuation mark leads to very contrasting meanings for what is happeningSymbolic activities impact our lives in five waysLanguage defines experiences , people , feelings , and thoughtsWe label people with languageWe label experiences in relationships with languageLanguage evaluatesLanguage is not neutralLanguage casts judgment and can be steady or even hatefulLanguage organizes perceptionsLanguage allows sibylline thoughtThinking hypothetically allows us to plan , dream , remember , set goals consider alternatives , and imagine possibilitiesClose relationships rely on moods of recent and presentHypothetical view allows personal growthLanguage allows self- reflectionLanguage allows us to oversee our communicationLanguage allows us to manage our imageSpeech communities constituent norms about how to use blab out and what purpose it servesSpeech communities are not defined by geography , but by shared understandings regarding communicationGender has received much explore attention as a lyric communityInteraction in games teaches boys and girls distinct understandings of why , when , and how to tattleCommunication rules in condition(p) in childhood are evident in braggart(a) communicationDifferences between men and women are a matter of degreeNot all women follow feminine rules of communication and not all men follow manful rules of communicationSocialization into different gender speech communities accounts for misunderstandingChapter 3I . some(prenominal) factors influence our perception processA . Physiology influences our perceptionB . come along influences our perceptionC . Culture influences our perceptionD . Social roles influence our perceptionE . Cognitive abilities influence our perception1 . Cognitive complexity , the number of bipolar dimensions along which we can make judgments , shapes perception2 . Person- centeredness , our ability to understand others as unique beings with unique motives , feelings , and behaviors , influences our perceptions? 3 .
Our ability to empathize influences perceptionF . intelligence of ourselves coming out of interpersonal communication influences perceptionJerry Maguire examples?fe mannish support system /conflict with her childLAUREL : All I m face . You let t keep up the luxury of falling for some drowningman . Be operable . today . Which turn over ( decoration holds up two tops DOROTHY : reach , you want to talk about practical ? Let s talk about my wonderful mannersDo you know what most other women my age are doing right now ? They arepartying in clubs , large(p) to act stupid , attempt to pee a man , trying to keep a mannot me . I m trying to RAISE a man(She grabs the sexier top , and puts it onDOROTHY (continuing ) I ve got a 24 hour a day reminder of Roger , for the rest of my career . I dupe had three lovers in four stratums , all boring , all achingly self- adequate , all friends of yours I top executive add , and all of them streak a distant present moment to a cranky vat . Look at me , bay tree wreath , look at me . I m the oldest 26 year old in the origination ! How do I lookLAUREL : technicalDOROTHY : ThanksExample 2 (conflict with her sonDOROTHY ?Okay , have we done for(p) over everything ? Back on Tuesday , rightJERRY : Yep . Have a real time at school , barb . Wish me luckDOROTHY / radiation therapy : Luck(Jerry nods and exits ?They check as Jerry inches into the move airportObscuring their view of Jerry , enters another pas de deux , who embrace and theirsmall daughter says sweet nicebye . We linger on Dorothy and atomic number 75 as they both watch in tranquilize and think of the kind of good-by they didn t get They look at each other , communicating volumes . They pull back into trafficDialogue 1 showed that the main character needed her sis s support when she invited Jerry Maguire for the maiden time . By turning to her babe , Dorothy , was looking for some form of validation that what she was about to do is right . Dorothy was also victimisation her babe , laurel wreath as a appear board for her own doubts and fearsThis parley relates to the course concept of communication climate Dorothy tells her infant how knotty it is to be a undivided flummox . This proves that Dorothy trusts medallion because she used self-disclosure Self-disclosure is revealing personal information about one s self that others are unlikely to nab on their own . Dorothy considers laurel wreath as an important athletic supporter because she can open up or talk about anything with her sister medallion is a fe buckram supporter of Dorothy . At the alike(p) time , they both had a conflict over their self-concepts . Conflict is intrinsic , linguistic rule , and inevitable in any interpersonal relationship . This conflict arose because their perceptions were different from each otherWhen Dorothy say , I am trying to rig out a man this shows that she ac intimacys her social self . Social self is the belief we hold about our self when we are with others , especially regarding our social roles .To resolve their conflict , Dorothy tells ribbon how she feels and what her frustrations are . She used I- language to clarify what she cute to tell Laurel . This was a good opportunity to resolve the conflict By use the I-language , Dorothy takes responsibility for everything that she was saying kind of of blaming everything on anyone elseLaurel s perception was different from Dorothy s . She thinks that Dorothy is acting irresponsibly and putting ray of light at a disadvantage because she invited a man over to her field of operations . But Dorothy knows she is not being do-nothing(prenominal) , so she told her sister that she knows her role as a ace mother . She then compares herself to other women in the same situationAlso end-to-end this dialogue , both women reveal their emotions Emotions are the feelings that are express during interpersonal communication . Laurel is worried about her sister and tries to be protective eon Dorothy struggles with one motherhood and her want for more freedom from responsibilityIn the end , Dorothy told her sister , Look at me Laurel , Look at me .How do I look thusly Laurel responded , Good This shows the win-lose orientation of the conflict . When Laurel verbalise Good , it showed that she is talent up her argument and is let Dorothy do whatever she wantsThis relates to the course concept of the self as an internalisation and action from social perspectives . Dorothy`s communication with her sister Laurel regarding the idea of inviting Jerry Maguire into her fellowship shows how our family members can be major influences on how we perceive ourselvesLaurel presents her reflected appraisal of Dorothy s decision downing it as irresponsible considering that Dorothy is raising a child . Laurel also downs the idea of Dorothy seeing Jerry Maguire , which she refers to him as a drowning man who her sister should not fall forIn the latter(prenominal) part of the select , Dorothy uses a social comparison to show the difference between her idol worship to single motherhood and the come alongingly reckless abandonment of other single women . She elaborates by discussing how women her age get to have a smokestack more fun than she does because she is limited by her responsibilities to her son . parenthesis from lack of social freedom , she also mentions that she does not have the security of a good , providing husband that other mothers haveDuring the expire part of the excerpt , after ranting about how hard life has been for her and how she looks old for her age , Dorothy seeks Laurel s confirmation on her physical show by asking how she looked . This showed Dorothy s social self and her need for favourable reception which was fortunately satisfied by Laurel s answer , good which she subsequently affirmed by saying , thanksIn dialogue 2 , although there was no bare conflict between Dorothy and give out , it can be tell that the conflict was definitely implied . It was a good example of what we learned in our course concept of non-verbal silenceBoth characters did not attempt to tattle while they were watching a complete family say goodbye to each other . When they face each other over again , slam and Dorothy spoke with their eyeball . This showed non-verbal silence at work . This was brought about by Dorothy s desire to protect diversify from the pang of acknowledging that he lacked a father figureIt also relates to the communication climate . Ray is still very young and he only has a gut feeling that there is something missing in his life . While Dorothy tries to do her best to ensure a good and felicitous life for her son , she in like manner , corporealizes that she does not have the ability to give everything that her son needs . This knowledge comes to Dorothy on her own musings and without Ray blaming her at all]^p DpYA opppppp?Oh zh z. For a teensy-weensy while it did feel like the three of them are a family until reality proven otherwiseWhen they saw a happy friction match with a little daughter , Dorothy and Ray communicate volumes Dorothy , although not to break up , was apologetic that she and Ray were not in the same family situation . Ray , on the other hand , seemed to be contemplating on why they were not like that other family . In their eyes , it could be seen that both were hoping that some day they can too become a normal familyAlthough it was not explicitly said , Dorothy clearly feels bad that her son does not have a father figure . even up though it was not her pick that her husband died , she feels obliged to find a way to gormandize that void in her son s life . Since she cannot seem to do so , she tended to put unnecessary pressure on herself which resulted in the fear that her son may grow up not knowing what it is like to be a real man . It is for this reason of trying to bring a male figurehead in Ray s life that she hires a male nanny , Chad , to help her when she is not mob ...If you want to get a full essay, order it on our website: Orderessay
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